Mum is fuming after spending £4,000 to attend wedding but her baby is banned

What would you do?

baby plane

Being a wedding guest can be expensive, and if the wedding is abroad the cost can skyrocket even further. One mum forked out thousands on flights for her and her baby to attend a family wedding but was told three weeks before the big day that her baby was not invited.

Taking to a forum on Netmums, the mum who has a five-month-old baby, vented her frustration after she spent £4,000 to attend a wedding in Australia and was only told three weeks before the event that she couldn't bring her baby.

The woman's cousin confirmed the date a year ahead but without an official invitation. When it finally arrived, three weeks before the wedding, it stated that no children could attend.

The mum explained: 'My cousin invited us to his wedding in Australia with 12 months notice. Sent us an email with the date no further info. My daughter is 5 months old. So my family said we would attend and we bought the flights. I chased for the actual invitation about 100 times and eventually it arrived 3 weeks before we flew. The invite said no children. I flagged that they really should have mentioned this before I bought the flight.

'When we got to Australia my family mentioned maybe I could hire a babysitter, I researched online but couldn't find anyone (they live in the suburbs) Everyone I knew in Australia, was attending the wedding. Am I being unreasonable to think its a joke they cant make an exception for a breastfeed baby flying from England?'

children wedding

The mum's cousin had a strict no children rule for the wedding but only told her three weeks before.

She summarised her thoughts with a final sentence: 'Don't have kids at your wedding, no problem. Don't make me spend £4k on flights and accommodation to be told that my baby cant come.'

Other users have rallied behind the mum and stressed that she is not being unreasonable.

One person said: 'If they didn't give you adequate notice of this fact they can hardly object now can they?! I would just ignore it tbh and take baby along, what else are you supposed to do now.'

Another added: 'I'd be furious too. If couples don't want children at their wedding that's absolutely their prerogative but they need to make it clear in plenty of time for guests to make arrangements for childcare or decide not to go. Failing to mention this "minor detail" until you were committed to going is extremely thoughtless.'

Even those who could empathise with the bride-to-be's wishes to not have any children at the wedding, agreed that she should have been upfront about it from the start.

Others said that perhaps the mum should have sought early clarification that the baby could attend and shouldn't have booked the flights until she got confirmation.

One person said: 'Normally I would say it’s the bride and groom’s decision whether they have children at their wedding, but given the distance you have travelled and the cost of going, they should have either told you before flights etc booked or allow your baby at the wedding.'

Jessica Ransom
Senior Food Writer

Jessica is a freelance food writer, stylist and recipe tester. She previously worked as Senior Food Writer at Future. While at Future Jessica wrote food and drink-related news stories and features, curated product pages, reviewed equipment, and developed recipes that she then styled on food shoots. She is an enthusiastic, self-taught cook who adores eating out and sharing great food and drink with friends and family. She has completed the Level 1 Associate course at the Academy of Cheese and is continually building on her knowledge of beers, wines, and spirits.