Today's parenting trends are vastly different from those of the generations who came before, but what do today's grandparents think about the millennial approach to parenting?
It's long been reported that millennials were never too keen on the parenting styles of their parents. The generation's top parenting rules for 2024 prove they’re determined not to make the same mistakes their own parents did and millennials have long been open and candid about what they wish their parents had done differently while they were growing up.
All of this has worked to create new parenting styles that encourage taking a new approach, an often softer and more thoughtful one than what many knew growing up.
But what about the parents of those millennials who are now grandparents? What do they think of the new way of parenting? Well, The Huffington Post spoke to a bunch of grandparents about their thoughts on today's parenting trends - and you might be surprised at what they have to say.
The first thing that stands out is how many grandparents believe their kids are actually better at parenting than they ever were. “My kids are so invested in their children," said one grandmother. "It’s beautiful!
"They use gentle parenting techniques, even with challenging personalities; provide them with healthy outlets and nurture their friends as well. They’re 100% better than I was - but I had to do it alone with five children. I’d choose my kid’s parenting over mine, every time!”
Another grandmother added, “My daughter and son-in-law have two teenagers. They’ve parented an A+.” While a grandfather said, “My kids are much better parents than I was. They are doing an amazing job.”
Still, there were some criticisms of the popular gentle parenting trend. “People who want to do gentle parenting should really educate themselves on how it works if they are trying to achieve the goals of gentle parenting," said one grandfather, echoing the words of many parents who regret gentle parenting their kids. "Frequently people confuse it with permissive parenting,” he added.
A grandmother also commented, “Too many of today’s parents are their children’s ‘friends,’ so no one is in control!”
Some lighter insight about something many parents today likely don't think twice about, one grandmother admitted she is envious of the 'conveniences' today's parents have. "[I] Just wish Amazon was a thing back then. Delivery of diapers alone would have made me continually grateful.”
Manners are another huge concern for grandparents. "I do notice the majority of today’s children aren’t emotionally regulated enough to use passable manners in restaurants, and I don’t understand what that’s about," one grandfather said. Similarly, another said, "Respect and manners are a big deal for me. Saying thank you is almost non-existent. It’s also very impolite to not return messages. Another pet peeve is being habitually late. Remember, children learn what they live."
There is also a more practical concern held by some that children aren't being raised to be resilient. “In a world soon to be dominated by artificial intelligence, where wants are met instantly, we need to step back to be able to teach patience and understanding that survival isn’t just about getting everything you want when you want it - that taking care of your needs and the needs of others is as important," one grandparent said before adding, "There will come time when a child is forced into a situation where common sense is required and you don’t have an app or device."
There often seems to be a disconnect between parents and grandparents, with some wondering if grandparents really love their grandkids more than their own children or searching for advice on how to build relationships with ‘estranged’ grandparents. But there has been increasingly positive research showing that kids are turning to grandparents for life advice and, in return, grandparents say they learn more from their grandkids than their own children.
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