Welcoming a new child comes with a host a new changes in your life, not least of which is how you interact with your other half.
And one mum has opened up about how becoming a parent really has affected her and her partner’s relationship.
Blogger, Sarah Woodside, opened up to her 11,000 Instagram followers about how she and her partner, Thomas, have struggled to appreciate and make time for one another in the 15 months since their son, Arlo, was born.
‘Things haven’t been too great lately with Thomas and I,’ wrote Sarah on her Instagram post. ‘I’m not sharing this because I want to tell the world our problems, but because I’ve always been real. If you are in a similar situation then please know you are not alone, having a child changes your entire life so it’s only normal your relationship may shift a little (or a lot) too.
‘We have both been stressed, run down, tired, grumpy and just a bit horrible to one another. But we are trying, because we want to make our family work and we love each other. I’m trying to bite my tongue a little more and he’s trying to be a bit more present and involved and we’re both trying to appreciate the other a little more.
‘It’s going to take work to get back to our happy little groove but we have both agreed that we want to put the work in. We’ve been together almost 5 years and a lot has happened in that time, but since our man arrived all our focus has been on him (as it should be) and we’ve been neglecting one another. So here’s to hard work and to getting us back on track.’
Her followers flooded the post with supportive comments, most of them parents saying that they’d been through the same thing.
‘It’s so hard and I think it takes you by surprise sometimes,’ wrote one follower.
While another opened up about her own issues: ‘I couldn’t have read this at a better time, this last week me and partner have been going through the same thing, he says he thought about leaving me as he doesn’t feel like I want him there as there is no affection and we are more like housemates than a couple. We have decided to try harder and work at it, no one tells you how much changes when you have a baby.’
‘Definitely normal, I know it’s not easy with a little one but you need to take the time to just be you two as a couple and not as mum and dad if that makes sense,’ advised one follower. ‘Try and bring back those memories of what brought you together before children and why you fell in love in the first place. And also remember that the stress you go through with the little one isn’t forever, things do get easier as they get older and you get little parts of your life back that makes it easier to put that time back into your relationship.’
Many parents found it refreshing to see such honesty on a public post, commenting that it made them feel better about their own situations as they can see they’re not going through it alone.
With a recent study revealing that a quarter of relationships are sexless and that having kids is the biggest passion killer, it’s no surprise that Sarah and Tom are struggling to find the secret to a happy relationship. Maybe this five-minute relationship hack could help towards bringing them closer.
Let’s hope Sarah and Thomas are able to get back on track soon!
What do you think about Sarah’s post? Has having a child dramatically affected your relationship? Do you have any tips on how to get thing back on track? Head over to our Facebook page and let us know!