‘Breasts… who’d have thought they’d cause so much chaos?!’ One dad’s VERY honest opinion on breastfeeding

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  • Alan from Candid Daddy Blog was selected by our BISS September panel and in his guest blog offers a dad’s perspective on the fuss over breastfeeding…


    There’s a topic for discussion. Before you have children, you don’t give them much thought. Or, you do give them a lot of thought, but not in any productive way.

    Then, you realise there’s an undiscovered war out there revolving all around breastfeeding, where the breastapo are casually passing judgement on those who aren’t breastfeeding.

    Arguably, the rationale of these militant lactivists isn’t wrong, but, without knowing the personal circumstances of every mother, it can be a cruel judgement to make.

    It’s pretty clear that breast is best. The NHS and lots of other medical authorities proclaim the superiority of breastfeeding, listing lots of valuable reasons including why breast milk is superior to formula milk. But, unfortunately, being able to breastfeed isn’t always simple…

    We were desperate to do what was considered best for our children and I’ve witnessed my wife go through the trials and tribulations of breastfeeding with three children with wildly different results.

    Our first child, for example, was born prematurely and simply would not take to the delicious dairy dumplings. This led to a fanatical milk expressing routine, which nearly broke us.

    The horrible spiral of trying to have sufficient expressed milk for me to do the feeds whilst she constantly expressed to maintain that supply, meant we were both deprived of what little amount of sleep we might otherwise have had. It was torture. The hum and vibration of the electric breast pump still haunts me to this day and will be forever etched into my memory and seared into my eardrums.

    Then there’s the debate around breastfeeding in public. It horrifies me to think there are people out there who are offensive to mothers who breastfeed in public, when babies’ needs are the sole driver for the act.

    I understand that breasts are a private part of a woman’s body, but I don’t think mothers are feeding their children in a show stealing cabaret act when sat on a bench outside Costa.

    I might be hypocritical in that I do feel sensitive to my wife bearing her milk-makers in public. However, this doesn’t equate to me having an issue with breastfeeding in public. In fact, breastfeeding doesn’t bother me in any environment, whether it’s in the high street, my home or a restaurant.

    Being candid (kinda important given the Candid Daddy moniker), I just don’t like the idea of her private areas being less private. But, quite rightly, babies’ needs should and do come first and that’s fine with me.

    So, really, breastfeeding is amazing and miraculous. Mothers who can do it, keep up the good work and I hope the intolerant idiots out there don’t deter you. But, for mothers who have tried but just cannot make it work or mothers who have considered it but decided it isn’t for you, I hope you don’t beat yourself up. If we try our best for our kids then that’s a success in my books.

    Breasts… who’d have thought they’d cause so much chaos!

    Alan was selected as a BISS guest blogger after entering our September linky. For your chance to write for GoodtoKnow, check out our Because I Said So platform.