Child psychologist Dr Becky shares the three lines every parent needs to know to help their child navigate their emotions - and they’re 'so simple'

"Every parent needs in their toolbox"

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A child psychologist has explained three phrases parents can use when their child is experiencing emotional pain - and why they're so important.

Raising kids might be rewarding and the best thing you ever do - but it isn't easy. There's the never-ending to-do list of new clothes to buy, packed lunches to make and school trips to pay for, but perhaps the most difficult part of parenting is working out how you make sure your child is a happy and healthy human, by teaching them emotional intelligence to raise resilient kids.

To tackle the momentous task, many parents rely on a toolbox of handy phrases and helpful activities that foster a nurturing environment for their kids, and some turn to parenting experts and child psychologists to find them. Dr Becky Kennedy is one of these, and she's built a huge following thanks to her parenting approach that emphasises the importance of understanding children’s emotions.

Recently, Dr Becky appeared on The School of Greatness podcast, where she revealed three lines that all parents should know and use when talking to their kids. Speaking to host Lewis Howes, she explained that by using the three phrases when a child is feeling emotional pain "I'm kind of infusing myself in every moment, I'm adding connection, I'm adding believing. Part of the pain was probably that they were alone."

3 lines every parent should know

  1. "I'm so glad you're talking to me about this"
  2. "I believe you"
  3. "Tell me more"

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Dr Becky explained that using these phrases validates how your child is feeling. Telling them you're grateful that they opened up lets them know "I still want to be in a relationship with you when you're feeling that way." She added that kids need to 'absorb' that their parents can tolerate this part of them before they learn to tolerate it themselves.

On saying 'I believe you', Dr Becky said, "If there's one line that would be probably the most healing and the most confidence building from childhood, it's that." She added that it's "so simple".

On social media, followers were supportive of Dr Becky's advice. One user wrote on Instagram, "So true! Kids need to feel safe, heard, and connected", while another said, "I appreciate you so much. This is invaluable information".

In related news, a psychologist has shared one thing you can do to raise successful children, and these three simple phrases can help parents ‘empower’ and ‘give agency’ to their teenage daughters. Elsewhere, check out the 164-year-old Swedish secret to raising happy and resilient kids - it's just three steps, and we're converted.

Ellie Hutchings
Family News Editor

Ellie is GoodtoKnow’s Family News Editor and covers all the latest trends in the parenting world - from relationship advice and baby names to wellbeing and self-care ideas for busy mums. Ellie is also an NCTJ-qualified journalist and has a distinction in MA Magazine Journalism from Nottingham Trent University and a first-class degree in Journalism from Cardiff University. Previously, Ellie has worked with BBC Good Food, The Big Issue, and the Nottingham Post, as well as freelancing as an arts and entertainment writer alongside her studies. When she’s not got her nose in a book, you’ll probably find Ellie jogging around her local park, indulging in an insta-worthy restaurant, or watching Netflix’s newest true crime documentary.