Don’t get us wrong – Grease is TOTALLY the word. It’s one of our all-time favourite musicals, and every time we watch it we sing every line and laugh at every joke. It is GREAT.
However, despite its many, many virtues, we don’t think any of you will disagree that some of the life lessons it teaches its audience are well… somewhat less than responsible.
Here are just some of the upstanding values that Grease has been teaching viewers for the last 37 years…
Being a virgin will get you nowhere in life except mocked by your friends
‘I can’t, I’m Sandra Dee!’
In fact, they’re probably mocking you at least 85% of the time
Your boyfriend, your career choices, your hickey from Kenickie – it’s all good material.
Nice girls always finish last
And we’re not just talking Sandy – how many times did Patty Simcox get pranked?
But inexplicably, dancing like THIS will make you one of the most popular boys in school
Even in a reflective silver jumpsuit. Baffling.
Details of romantic encounters should always be relayed to the entire school. In song form, naturally.
Seriously – Every. Single. Detail.
Matching jackets are cool and you need to get some
They can be pink or PVC. No other option is available.
Similarly, smoking is cool and you need to be doing it
Light up, toots.
Don’t even bother trying to achieve your dreams
You’ll end up dying your hair pink, getting serenaded by an old man, and having to go back to high school anyway.
All you need to be happy is a boy to really truly like you – and for that you’ll need leather trousers, a cigarette, and a bucketload of perming solution
Remember, everyone needs a cigarette. Are you all smoking yet?
A sure sign of your success is him crawling on the floor behind you
If he’s not on his knees, he ain’t THAT pleased.
After all, there are worse things that you could do than go with a boy or two
Even if you do end up like a defective typewriter.
And even in the face of an extremely high risk of lung cancer, friendship will somehow conquer all regardless
Because we DO go together like rama lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong.
Oh, and also, cars can fly