‘I describe it as a monster’ Nadiya Hussain opens up about living with a panic disorder

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  • Former Great British Bake Off

     champion Nadiya Hussain has opened up about how her experience of suffering with a panic disorder feels like ‘living with a monster’.

    Speaking with presenter John Bishop as part of his new chat show, ‘In Conversation With…’, Nadiya revealed that she’s been battling the challenging condition for years.

    ‘My whole life revolves around not falling apart,’ she explained. ‘I describe it as a monster. Some days the monster shouts in my face, no matter where I turn he will keep shouting at me, I can’t get him out of my face.’

    ‘Other days he’s behind me and he’ll tap me on the shoulder a little bit here and there through the day and I can ignore him completely.’

    ‘Other days I can put him in my pocket. He’s always there.’

    ‘I’ve spent my whole life trying to find a cure,’ she revealed. ‘You’ll go to the doctors and they will give you pills and then you just won’t feel anything. What’s the point in not feeling anything? It’s never going to go away, I have to learn to live with my monster, he’s always going to be there.’

    It’s not the first time Nadiya has opened up about struggling with her mental health. In June of this year she appeared on Loose Women and told hosts that she had suffered from anxiety since the age of seven, when she was the victim of a racist attack.

    ‘I think back to where I remember that moment distinctly, I was seven years old and I used to get bullied quite a lot for my skin colour because I had dark skin,’ she said at the time.

    ‘These boys they held me up against a white board, you know when we were younger and we had those chalk boards and the chalk would all fall at the bottom, so they held me up against this chalk board.’

    ‘They got the chalk dust and smothered my face in it and I remember that moment being stood there thinking, “Everyone is looking at me and everybody is watching me and I don’t know what to do”.’

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