Before we had children we all thought we had a pretty good grasp on life. We surived for long enough without them around. But there are certain things that only motherhood can teach a person.
How to deal with toddler tantrums, where the other shoe might have possibly gone, how to chop carrots so small that they are inconspicuous in any meal. And of course all the words to Frozen. Ever.
So here at GoodtoKnow we decided to round-up the ultimate feelings that bond us mums together. The things that only a worn out, stressed out but, ultimately, blessed mum will understand and how these lessons get us through each day surrounded by tiny, mess-creating little monsters…
1. On making the right kind of friends
Of course 4 o’clock on a Tuesday is the right time.
2. On explaining parenting to other people
How can they manage to cause such carnage but they can’t get themselves dressed?
3. On justifying not cleaning for three weeks
You’d think the Queen was coming round.
4. On your intentions for next Christmas
Funnily enough I don’t love stuffing a turkey as much as you all seem to think.
5. On receiving gifts
Failing that, a bar of chocolate in the fridge.
6. On achieving that perfect mum-body
Do I get a medal?
7. On decorating the house for Christmas
There’s a reason I soak the Christmas pudding in Brandy.
8. On teaching by example
I’m going to lock myself in my bedroom now.
9. On achieving the perfect mum-body part II
Just to be sure.
10. On giving up on all hope of ever seeing your old body again
The salad bar is where breadsticks go to hide.
11. On getting your children to bed before their bed-time
And neither of them will remember it in the morning.
12. On parental responsiblities
God forbid it’s a snow day.
13. On spending money
And all of the ‘let’s not tell daddy about this’ sweet payments.
14. On wine. All the wine.
And so is a bathtub come to think of it…
15. On husbands
16. On your wild social life
This is the same woman who thinks looking at wallpaper samples is exciting.
17. On cooking a balanced meal
If it wasn’t for children, we’d eat cereal and wine every night of the week.
18. On the joys of Christmas
My mother-in-law is staying for two days. Ok?
19. On Father Christmas
Not the naughty list. Please. I can explain…
20. On being a parent
How long till they leave home?