The 6 questions to ask your partner at the start of 2024 for a relationship check-in - and #4 could be make or break

If one of your New Year's resolutions is to work on your relationship, check out these six questions shared by an expert.

A heterosexual couple looking at each other while sat at a table drinking coffee
(Image credit: Getty Images)

Head into the New Year while building intimacy with your partner thanks to these six check-in questions.

You may have heard of the infamous 'Divorce Day' that falls in the first week of January, but for many couples the new year brings a perfect opportunity to spice up a relationship and start fancying your partner again.

And one of the ways that you can start working on your romantic happiness this year is by having regular check-ins with your partner. While they might not be super sexy, relationship check-ins are an opportunity for you and your significant other to talk about the health of your relationship, show some appreciation for each other and make sure you're on the same page.

There's no better time to reflect on your relationship than the start of a new year, and the experts at Paired - a relationship app that aims to help bring couples closer together - have shared six questions you can ask your partner during your next check-in.

In the video, they said, "This is your friendly reminder to have your monthly relationship check-in, and since it’s New Year, I’ve got six questions for you and your partner to reflect on your relationship in 2023…"

6 questions to ask your partner for a relationship check-in:


♬ original sound - Paired
  1. What was your favourite thing we did together in 2023?
  2. What’s one thing you wish we’d done more of in the last year?
  3. What are you most looking forward to us sharing in the next year?
  4. What areas do you think we could improve on going forward?
  5. What would you like to let go of moving into 2024?
  6. What are your hopes for where we will be as a couple at the end of 2024?

Over on its website, Paired has explained more about what a relationship check-in is and how it works.

It says, "Good communication is a vital component of a healthy relationship, whether you’ve been married for years or have just made things official. But day-to-day life inevitably gets in the way, and it’s normal for communication with your partner to plateau. That’s where relationship check-ins come in."

It adds, "It can be dangerous to assume that you and your partner are always on the same page about everything, so unless you can read minds, you’ll have to communicate those needs through words. "

Paired has also offered some tips on how to conduct a relationship check-in:

  • Tell your partner: Let your significant other know that you’re not trying to test them or pick a fight, but rather it’s a time for the two of you to connect. 
  • Schedule it: Putting a time and date in the diary will help you be in a suitable mental space and ensure you’re not rushing through it. 
  • Don't criticise: If you need to get something off your chest, address it calmly and avoid placing blame.
  • Have fun: Relationship check-ins are a way for you and your partner to connect and appreciate one another, they shouldn’t feel like a chore. Why not make it a part of date night?
  • Do it regularly: How often you should check in depends on your unique relationship needs, but it's important to make it part of your schedule.

With Paired, you receive monthly relationship check-ins with your partner and answer nine relationship check-in questions. Once you’ve both answered the questions, you’ll be able to compare answers, see your strength and growth areas, and track your progress.

You can download Paired on the App Store or Google Play.

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Ellie Hutchings
Family News Editor

Ellie is GoodtoKnow’s Family News Editor and covers all the latest trends in the parenting world - from relationship advice and baby names to wellbeing and self-care ideas for busy mums. Ellie is also an NCTJ-qualified journalist and has a distinction in MA Magazine Journalism from Nottingham Trent University and a first-class degree in Journalism from Cardiff University. Previously, Ellie has worked with BBC Good Food, The Big Issue, and the Nottingham Post, as well as freelancing as an arts and entertainment writer alongside her studies. When she’s not got her nose in a book, you’ll probably find Ellie jogging around her local park, indulging in an insta-worthy restaurant, or watching Netflix’s newest true crime documentary.