Did you know that jokes for kids lead to laughter, and laughter is essential for a child's development?
Laughter helps kids relax, boosts immunity, and promotes creative thinking. Telling jokes is a great way to get your kids laughing and bring your family closer together.
We've compiled a list of kid-approved jokes that are sure to get your little ones grinning from ear to ear. Get more rib-ticklers with our guide to the best dad jokes and get their minds whizzing with the best riddles for kids. Our fun facts for kids will also blow their minds as well as reading up on who was Guy Fawkes? - we share all the firework facts.
Funnyman Jake Harris, Audio Producer and host at screen-free audio player for kids, Yoto (if you're thinking of buying one, check out our Yoto Vs Tonie piece), has plenty of experience in making kids laugh. "Telling jokes is all about community. To share a joke strengthens relationships, breaks down barriers, and builds confidence." He would know - his popular "Friyay Jokes" podcast segment has received thousands of joke submissions from children worldwide. Jake's tip for the most popular kids' joke ever? Scroll down to find out...
Jokes for kids
Jokes for 4 year olds
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
- What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
- Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
- What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument? A moo-sician.
- How do you organise a space party? You "planet"!
- What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
- What do cows do for fun? They go to the moooo-vies
- What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore
- What do you call a train that sneezes? Achoo-choo train
- Where does the queen keep her armies? In her sleevies
- What wobbles in the sky? A jelly-copter
- What's brown and sticky? A stick!
- Why are pirates called pirates? Because they ARRRR!
- Why do giraffes have such long necks? Because they have smelly feet!
- How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
- What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
- What do you call a bear that's stuck in traffic? A grizzly bear!
- How does a snowman get around? By riding an "icicle"!
- What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
- What is black and white and goes round and round? A penguin in a tumble dryer
- What do elves learn at school? The elf-abet
- What do you call a fairy that doesn’t like to shower? Stinkerbell!
- What's a monster's favourite game? Swallow the leader!
- What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud!
- What kind of shorts does a cloud wear? Thunderpants!
- What do you call a donkey with three legs? Wonky
- What’s the difference between elephants and bananas? Bananas are yellow.
- What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A woolly jumper
- What did the policeman say to his tummy? You're under a vest!
- How do you start a teddy bear race? Ready teddy go!
Jokes for 6 year olds
- Why did the kid put sugar under his pillow? He wanted to have sweet dreams!
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
- What did one tomato say to the other tomato? You go ahead and I'll ketchup
- Why do bees hum? They’ve forgotten the words.
- What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!
- What goes “tick, woof, tick woof”? A watch dog
- What's a vampire's favorite fruit? A blood orange!
- What do you get if you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks
- What do kittens like to eat? Mice cream
- How do bees brush their hair? They use honeycombs
- Do you want to hear a joke about a pizza? Never mind, it’s too cheesy!
- Why don’t polar bears eat penguins? Because they can’t get the wrappers off
- What did one eye say to the other eye? Between us, something smells
- Why was the broom late for school? It overswept!
- What do you call a boomerang that won't come back? A stick
- Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9!
- What goes "Ha ha ha.....THUD!"? A monster laughing his head off
- Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed!
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh
- What did one plate say to the other plate? "Lunch is on me!"
- What do you call a gorilla with bananas in its ears? Anything you like, he can’t hear you
- What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!
- What's a skeleton's least favorite room in the house? The living room
- Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
- What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved!
- What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
- What happens when you tell a joke to an egg? It cracks up!
- Why do sharks live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was feeling crummy!
Jokes for 7 year olds
- What do you call a snowman in summer? A puddle!
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they would be bagels!
- What do you get when you cross a centipede and a parrot? A walkie-talkie!
- Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
- Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she'll let it go!
- What time is it when the clock strikes 13? Time to get a new clock
- Why couldn't the pony sing a lullaby? Because she was a little horse
- How do you talk to a giant? Use big words!
- What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested custard!
- How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten (tickles)
- Why do dragons sleep during the day? So they can fight knights
- What’s red and invisible? No tomatoes
- Why did the starfish blush? Because the sea weed
- What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear
- What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper
- What did one toilet say to the other? You look a bit flushed
- What time should you go to the dentist? Tooth hurty
- Knock, knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? I didn't know you could yodel!
- Why did the burglar take a shower? He wanted to make a clean getaway
- How can you tell which rabbit is the oldest? Look for grey hares
- Where does Tarzan buy his clothes? At a jungle sale
- When is it bad luck to meet a black cat? When you’re a mouse
- I started writing a story about a broken pencil, but I gave up because it was pointless
- What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts
- How are false teeth like stars? They come out at night.
- What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm
- What is a computer's favourite snack? Computer chips.
- What is a tornado’s favourite game to play? Twister
- What did the Dalmatian say after lunch? That hit the spot
- Why did the toilet roll roll down the hill? To get to the bottom
Jokes for 10 year olds
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh…MOOOOOOO! (Jake's tip for the most popular kids' joke ever!!)
- What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses? A coconut on holiday
- Knock, knock Who’s there? Europe. Europe who? No, you’re a poo!
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t peeling very well
- What’s the one thing will you get every year on your birthday, guaranteed? A year older
- Why do candles always go on the top of cakes? Because it's hard to light them from the bottom
- What goes up but never comes down? Your age
- Why was the equal sign so humble? Because he wasn’t greater than or less than anyone else
- Are monsters good at math? Not unless you count Dracula
- What do you call a rich elf? Welfy
- When does it rain money? When there is "change" in the weather
- How did the yeti feel when he had flu? Abominable
- What’s the difference between mashed potatoes and pea soup? Anyone can mash potatoes….
- How does the man in the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it
- What’s faster, cold or hot? Hot, because you can catch a cold
- What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop!
- Why does nobody talk to circles? Because there’s no point
- What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk? An udder failure
- What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk
- Why did the snake cross the road? To get to the other ssside
- Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools
- How did the pirate get his flag so cheaply? He bought it on sail
- What is a cat's favourite colour? Purrr-ple
- Where did the school kittens go for their field trip? To the mew-seum
- Why do ducks make good detectives? They always quack the case
- What part of a fish weighs the most? The scales
- 10. What do cows read? Cattle-logs
- What kind of key opens a banana? A mon-key
- Where do horses live? Neigghhhh-bourhoods
- What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice krispies
Jokes for 11 year olds
- What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas
- Why did the pony get sent to his room? He couldn't stop horsing around
- Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? He had no body to dance with
- Where do sheep get their hair cut? The baa baas
- Why do vampires seem sick? They're always coffin
- Why do tigers have stripes? So they don't get spotted
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Spell. Spell who? W. H. O.
- Why are ghosts such bad liars? You can see right through them
- Knock knock. Who's there? Cows go. Cows go who? No silly, cows go MOO!
- Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke
- What's a pirate's favourite letter of the alphabet? The C
- Why did the boy eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake
- What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey
- What did one bogey say to the other? You think you're funny but you're snot
- Why was Tigger in the bathroom? He was looking for Pooh
- What do you call a witch who goes on holiday to the seaside? A sand-witch
- What did the nose say to the finger? Stop picking on me
- Why was the sand wet? Because the sea weed
- Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing
- What's the smelliest game in the world? Top Trumps
- Teacher: If i had six oranges in one hand and seven oranges in the other hand, what would I have? Pupil: Massive hands!
- Why did the teacher wear sunglasses? Because her pupils were so bright
- What's a snake's favourite subject at school? Hiss-tory
- Why is Buzz Lightyear so good at maths? Because he can count to infinity and beyond
- What did zero say to eight? Nice belt!
- Which hand is it better to write with? Neither, it’s better to write with a pencil!
- What do you call a man who's always late? Mister Bus
- Where do you learn to make ice cream? Sundae school
- How do you get an astronaut’s baby to stop crying? You rocket!
- Why did the girl throw a clock out of the window? Because she wanted to see time fly
Jokes for 12 year olds
- Did you hear about the magic tractor? It turned into a field
- What day of the week are most twins born on? Twos-day
- What kind of room doesn't have doors? A mushroom
- Who is the world's greatest underwater secret agent? James Pond
- Why did the scientist wear denim? Because he was a jean-ius
- What do you call a man trapped in a paper bag? Russell
- What happens when cows refuse to be milked? Udder chaos!
- A man was taken to hospital after eating daffodil bulbs. Doctors say he’s recovering and he’ll be out in the Spring.
- What do you do if you see a spaceman? Park your car, man
- What do you call a man with a large flat fish on his head? Ray!
- Where do hamburgers go to dance? The meat-ball.
- Why did the tree go to the dentist? It needed a root canal.
- Why can’t you trust atoms? They make up everything!
- Why do moon rocks taste better than earth rocks? Because they’re meteor.
- When do doctors get angry? When they run out of patients.
- Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? In case they got a hole in one.
- What did the calculator say to the maths student? You can count on me.
- What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock? Look! No hands!
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus.
- What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around, and I’ll go on ahead.
- Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory? Lack of concentration.
- What did one tonsil say to the other? Better get dressed. The doctor’s taking us out tonight!
- Why should you never trust a pig with a secret? Because it’s bound to squeal.
- What does a spider’s bride wear? A webbing dress.
- Where do young cows eat lunch? In the calf-ateria.
- What do birds give out on Halloween? Tweets.
- What do you call a flower that runs on electricity? A power plant!
- What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers!
- Why did teachers stop doing tests at the zoo? Because it was full of cheetahs!
- What has four wheels and flies? A rubbish truck!
Joking around with your kids is a great way to bond with them, get their attention and gain their trust. Now you've laid the groundwork, here are more ways to open up communication with your child, from questions to ask them after school, to having conversations about healthy eating, Plus, wondering how to broach the subject of sexuality? Our guide to talking to your kids about coming out has all the expert information and advice you need.
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Joanne Lewsley is a freelance copywriter and editor who creates parenting, health and lifestyle content for evidence-based websites, including BabyCentre, Live Science, Medical News Today and more.
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